If you love Blazing Saddles, and nutjob defensive ends, then this YouTube’s for you. Jared Allen is the man, isn’t he?

Find UFC 77 online wherever you can and watch Anderson Silva hand Rich Franklin another beatdown in Rich’s hometown. And you thought the Bengals’ defense couldn’t stand up to a great offense. Again, for my money, Silva’s the best in the MMA game right now. At any weight class.

I’ve got a ridiculous 3,000-word opus on my favorite show, Friday Night Lights, that just dropped over on Epic Carnival. Check it out and tune in tonight (9 PM EST NBC), or at least DVR that shit. What do you have to lose? Need more convincing? Fine, here’s a couple of trailers…

Friday Flicks has a new home — Epic Carnival every Friday morning. The feature is also now called The Main Attraction.

• THE MAIN ATTRACTION: THE KINGDOM - Epic Carnival
  

(listening pleasure: My Morning Jacket - the entire album Z)

Couldn’t 10 cops have cuffed and carried this UF student out of the town hall without tasing him and making him look like a little bitch? Sure, he wasn’t acting appropriately, but I’m pretty sure there was a better way to handle this thing, especially with 10 cops present. He wasn’t being violent or threatening anybody, just resisting removal/arrest. This is teetering on police brutality and definitely was uncalled for. Even with free speech, I understand that there is a time and place for everything. I even worked for Senator John Kerry during his presidential campaign, and I still don’t think this was threatening to Sen. Kerry. I think this was a ridiculous way to handle things by the UF police. Gainesville is the new South Central, I guess.

(daps: More Credible)

Here’s the preview for tonight’s Dan “Hollywood” Henderson vs. Quinton “Rampage”Jackson unification match. But before we get to that, here’s my prediction for the fight: Rampage wins in round two by knockout. Just the way I see it going down…

We got are noodles wet last night during that absolute demolition job Peyton Manning and the Indianapolis Colts did to the New Orleans Saints lat night. And while it was great to finally usher in the NFL season, what the hell do they expect us to do until Sunday without any other games? Especially for us non-college football junkies? Fortunately, we’re not shit out of luck…

• Non-Football Shit to Do Until Sunday 

• DVD - Grindhouse Presents, Death Proof (Extended Cut) - Since this doesn’t come out for another week and a half, you’ll have to get resourceful and find it on the Net (I won’t tell you how, but trust me — it’s possible). Planet Terror sucked, so seeing a longer version of this film without having to endure the ho-hum P.T. first is definitely the way to go. Call me a fan boy, but Quentin Tarantino can truly do no wrong.

• In Theatres - 3:10 to Yuma - Now, Shoot ‘Em Up starring Clive Owen probably isn’t a terrible call, especialy if you’re looking for that last popcorn flick of the summer. I love Owen (Children of Men fucking rocked), Paul Giamatti can act his ass off and Monica Bellucci is just about the hottest thing alive. But we see dozens of movies like that every few years. How often do we see a critically praised (82% on Rotten Tomatoes) Western that pits two of today’s finest actors working – Christian Bale and Russell Crowe — up against one another? How about never. From what I’ve heard, Walk the Line director James Mangold knocks this one out of the park Rick Ankiel-on-HGH style.

• UFC - UFC 75: Champion vs. Champion: Dan Henderson vs. Quenton “Rampage” Jackson - This highly anticipated London bout is both free on Spike TV, and the first ever UFC unification title bout (both the PRIDE and UFC light heavyweight titles are on the line). Henderson took his title from Wanderlei Silva, Jackson from Chuck Liddell, and both fighters won by highlight-reel knockouts. I’d wish that I was extremely confident about my boy Rampage walking away the undisputed champ after dropping Big Dan, but it could go either way. You absolutely, positively, do not want to miss this card.

More football stuff coming later in the weekend, including the second half of my NFL preview, some fantasy stuff, etc…

I’ve always had mixed emotions about longtime Kansas City Chiefs general manager Carl Peterson, aka King Carl. I must admit, however, that this is one of my all-time favorite King Carl moments. I’m not going to say that it’s difficult to make President Bush look stupid. What I will say is that Peterson certainly has a monster set of testicles on him. I guess when you deal with the Drew Ronsenhauses and Tom Condons of the world everyday, Dub-ya is no problem. From HBO’s Hard Knocks…

On a more serious note, go here to buy the hat and support the Greensburg, KS tornado victims and the Greensburg Rangers football team.

(Footage courtesy of HBO/NFL Films)

Labor Day weekend has passed. All of the fantasy drafts are over, all the boats have docked, and, hopefully, everyone has made a safe return back to the real world. That being said, you are probably either severely depressed to be back at work or eagerly anticipating the NFL’s kickoff weekend (or both). Taking that into consideration, I think the Pacman Jonesin’ NFL preview might be exactly what you all need to get through this tough time. Reader beware: This NFL preview has Tourettes. I can and will say anything that pops into my head while discussing each team. C’mon, don’t tell me you’ve never wanted to act like this…

• NFL Preview With Tourettes Part I
  

• Arizona Cardinals - It’s ironic that the Cards play in the desert, because they’re the most snake-bitten team in the NFL. I would feel bad for Whizzincunt’s new team, but for as cool as Matt Leinart thinks he is, he’s a real fucking loser. A loser who has a lot more money STDs than me (I have none, for the record). Don’t bet on this squad and only rely on Anquan Boldin and Larry Fitzgerald fantasy football wise. 2008 Prediction: About 7-9

• Atlanta Falcons - They’ll be under dogs all season long. Sorry. Couldn’t help it. I told you about my condition. Anyway, Joey Harrington might not be as exciting as Ookie, but he’s a nice guy who doesn’t misbehave off the field, have Leinart Syndrome or sneak contraband through airports. Alge Crumpler is the only guy you really want on your fantasy team, unless you want to take a flier on Joe Horn late. 2008 Prediction: About 6-10

• Baltimore Ravens - Big deal — they dumped one scumbag for another. If Willis McGahee scores more rushing touchdowns in ‘07 than he has illegitimate kids, I’ll be shocked. Still, the Ravens have a dominant defense and one of the better coaches in the league in Brian Billeck. Plus, Steve McNair knows how to get it done. Never put anything past a man who can get arrested fro DUI from the passenger seat. 2008 Prediction: About 11-5

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