(Friday Flicks is a weekly feature in which I ask: What if NFL stars or other athletes starred in this week’s biggest release or in past classics? Plus, I’ll let you know what you should see, and what you should avoid like Ron Mexico’s sloppy seconds.)

Bruce Willis (actor)/John McClane (fictional badass protagonist) - He’s lost almost all of his hair, and pundits say he’s past his prime. Bruce just couldn’t let go of his favorite role, though, after the way the third installment of the Die Hard franchise flopped — critically ( a piss-poor 47% culmative critic’s score over on Rotten Tomatoes) and even somewhat commercially. He’s a tough guy and a winner, and he’s hellbent on this franchise finishing on a high note. It’s damn hard to not like a guy like that.

Live Free or Die Hard, the latest and fourth Die Hard flick, is doing well thus far box office-wise (already $16 M after a Wednesday opening) after receiving solid reviews (77% on Rotten Tomatoes). Even ballbusting film critic Peter Travers liked the film. Who knows, maybe Travers is to Willis what John Madden is to Favre?

One negative note — Live Free or Die Hard is rated PG-13. Has big, bad Bruce suddenly caught a case of pussitis? Or are he and the studioheads just trying to reach a broader demographic?

Brett Favre (Green Bay Packers QB/real-life badass) -He’s lost hair, and pundits say he’s past his prime. Brett just couldn’t let go of his favorite role, though, after the way the latest installment his franchise flopped — his Pack narrowly missed the playoffs in the weak NFC. Like Willis, he’s a tough guy and a winner, and he is also hellbent on his franchise finishing on a high note. Again, it’s damn hard to not like a guy like that.

It’s hard to say if Favre’s Packers will be any better than the team’s 8-8 record one year ago, and have success similar to what Willis and his franchise are currently enjoying. Favre will likely break two of Dan Marino’s records, though. And Madden, like Travers did with Willis, will give Favre glowing reviews no matter what.

One negative note — the way he’s unloaded the ball prematurely and been picked time and time again the last few seasons, is he suddenly afraid of getting hit? Has big, bad Brett suddenly caught a case of pussitis? Yeah, I know, it’s gotta be a lot tougher without the pills and your old offensive line.

On a more serious note, I respect both Favre and Willis immensely. Both love what they do, and nobody, and I mean nobody, will tell them that it’s time to retire. Mad respeck!

What to see this weekend:

• Live Free or Die Hard - I never thought I’d do this, but I’m recommending it. Both the reviews and the word of mouth has been surprisingly good. And there’s only one way to see a Summer popcorn flick like this — on the big screen
• 1408 - Good horror movies are sort of like shutdown NFL cornerbacks — rare. John Cusack. Sam Jackson. Stephen King. What’s not to like? I haven’t seen it, but both the premise and the trailer remind me of The Twilight Zone. Plus, the reviews have been pretty favorable.

What to avoid like Ron Mexico’s sloppy seconds:

• Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer - If you want to see Jessica Alba just Google her for fuck’s sake.

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Been busy as hell with our main site launch (Fan-Sided Blogs — fansided.com), so this one is going to be a quickie…

• Tank, you know I love you – you don’t have to lie to kick it. This guy can’t stop, won’t stop. Unreal.
• My boys 7 and Banky ramble on about The Namesake (Pacman), one of his stooges (Tank), my favorite squad (The Chiefs) and my least favorite one (The Donks). Klosterman and Simmons ain’t got shit on these two. If you missed the first exchange about John Elway’s boy Jack, click here as well.
• For all of you AFC East fans, The Phinsider has an excellent feature running right now called “Around the ACF East.”
• The Falcoholic is right — nobody cares about the NFL Europa, even overseas. Who gives a damn that the league folded. I never watched one snap, and I’m a football fiend. I’ll watch the AFL some, but that’s as low as I’ll stoop.

• The good people over at NFL Gridiron Gab inform us that Ricky Williams will not play for the Phins again. I can’t believe Ricky hadn’t been mentioned on this blog until now. I’m a disgrace to The Namesake.

There isn’t much that’s less enjoyable these days than being an Indiana Pacers fan. I mean, this guy and this guy, not to mention sick boy, really hung us out to dry. Then we trade for a guy with tats like this (just look at the bottom right one).

Anyway, one thing that is worse — being a Pacers fan that’s not also a Colts fan. You see, growing up in Missouri I had my Kansas City Chiefs (who the Colts have knocked out of the playoffs twice in a row) and Royals, but no basketball team (unless you count the Kings, who were only in K.C. briefly during times I barely can remember). I loved watching Reggie Miller play in college. So, when the Pacers drafted him they automatically became my favorite NBA team and have been ever since. When everyone else was booing on draft day back in 1987, I was chanting “Reggie… Reggie… Reggie…”

Fast forward about 20 years.

The Pacers had zero draft choices tonight, so I don’t exactly know why I even watched. Even the Stephen A.-Vitale screaming matches have grown dull, and I’m so sick of Jay Bilas and his lingo that I want to slap him “tremendous upside” his head. Still, I tuned in and watched the whole thing. Maybe it was just the allure of Kevin Durant and Greg Oden? Or maybe I thought that Jermaine O’Neal was actually going to get dealt?

The night was pretty damn exciting for the rest of the league, but it completely sucked for us Pacer fans.

Two homegrown Indy natives with All-Star talent — Oden and Zach Randolph — went to other teams.

Three sharpshooters that all were attainable — Morris Almond, Ray Allen and Rudy Fernandez — went to other teams.

Very, very disappointing, man. We had absolutely no chance to get Oden, but those other four guys were there for the taking.

In fact, the only player we landed was a 7-foot-1 Croatian ogre named Stanko Barac. “Stanko, you ‘effing stink!” I yelled at my bro’s big screen when he got selected. You know what’s even worse than drafting a white 7-foot stiff named Stanko? The fact that the Pacers traded for him, yet don’t expect him to be available for three or four years. I might get banned in both Beantown and Naptown for saying this, but maybe it’s about time we strip Larry Legend of his nickname. At least when we are referring to him as a basketball executive.

I have absolutely nothing to look forward to Pacers-wise next year — well, save maybe the No. 1 pick; my Royals just had their first winning month in 22 months; and my Chiefs are starting a rookie QB that was picked in the third round. Ouch. Hopefully, my K-State Wildcats can mount good seasons sans Huggy Dusche and King Snyder.

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