This is ridiculous. I can’t believe that O.J. Simpson agreed to this live Internet interview, but I’m glad as hell he did. Seriously, even though the interview is somewhat demented, it might be the greatest Internet video clip I’ve ever seen. Wait, because it gets better — O.J. will do this three more times this week over at MN1.com.

(Hat tip: TMZ.com)

We’ve all met, and fell for, Kwame Brown chicks (or dudes… and I hit on this two weeks ago). You know, those of the looks-like-Jane-dates-like-Tarzan variety. Whether they are annoying, crazy, dumb or scandalous, they all end up being flat-out busts.

There’s two sides of every coin, though. For every overrated Darko dame, there’s an unheralded Priest prize hidden somewhere out there. Here’s some new terminology to add to your vocabularies for both types:

The Busts

• The Darko - You know there’s safer choices out there — in fact, much safer — but her long-term upside intoxicated you. Speaking of intoxication, both you and Joe Dumars probably were drunk when you made this move.

• The Akili Smith - The can’t-miss-prospect that misses — badly. The kind of girl that causes you and your boys to reminisce about what could have been. Often. In the end, you all just guess that she’s running around somewhere up in Canada with a bunch of minor leaguers.

• The Baby Jordan - Damn did she look good. That is until you realized that it was all window dressing and not the real thing. To paraphrase Chris Rock, “you got Skeet Ulrich when you thought you had Johnny Depp.”

• The Ryan Leaf - When you take a hot girl home and realize that she’s totally not what you thought she was. So, if you’ve taken home a tranny, don’t worry — so did the Chargers.

• The Roy Jones Jr. - She wasn’t really all that in the first place. It was the inferior competition that made her seem like a dime piece, when in reality she wasn’t worth much more than a nickel.

• The T.O. - Despite all of her previous problems — and let’s face it, there were lots of ‘em — you were convinced things would be different when she was with you. You got burned. That’s what you get for being a cocky bastard.

• The Michelle Wie - Is she ever going to be of age? I’m just fucking with you.

The Gems

• The Priest - Everyone else slept on this girl, but shouldn’t have. All that she needed was a chance to shine, and boy did she ever when she finally got her shot. Here’s hoping that she’s not just in it for the money, and also that you can afford her hospital bills. Silly gold-diggin’ hypochondriacs.

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I have the utmost respect for Bill Walsh as both a person and a football coach. I felt the ripple effect of his death all the way here Missouri, as my brother is a football coach. He viewed Walsh as a hero. This “Bill Walsh Coaching Tree” can describe the effect he had on the game I love better than anything I can type here. I’m not sure one man has ever left a bigger imprint on the game of football. You will be missed and remembered, and not just by San Fransisco 49ers fans, but by all of us who have a passion for the NFL. You turned football into a thinking man’s game. You turned red-faced, hoarse-voiced coaches into teachers. You turned Rice-Montana into a pigskin symphony that will never be replicated (no offense, Marvin and Peyton).

There will never, ever be another Bill Walsh. Believe that.

Remembering Walsh:

• SFGate.com
• Niners Nation
• 49ersnews.com
• Mining the Gold Rush
• Six Pack Sports Report
• Fanhouse
• Dennis Dillon/Sporting News
• Clark Judge/CBS Sportsline
• Tom Weir/USA Today
• NFL Czar/Fox Sports
• Ira Miller/Fox Sports
• “Levy recalls giving Walsh his start” - AP
• Michael Silver/SI.com
• Dr. Z/SI.com
• Peter King/SI.com
• Jeremy Green/ESPN
• Ivan Maisel/ESPN
  
• Hashmarks

I’m not much of a pro wrestling fan now, but growing up I was fanatical about the WWF and WCW/NWA.

I remember when Hulk Hogan bodyslammed Andre the Giant (Bill Simmons’ favorite moment out of the history of everything.) I remember pretending to be either “Rowdy” Roddy Piper or The Ultimate Warrior and bullying the other kids in my neighborhood. I remember seeing The Nature Boy and Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat fight for an hour plus without even breaking a sweat (”wooooooo!”). I remember running around screaming, “oooohhhhh yeaaahhhhh!” I remember The Stinger Splash, The Toture Rack, The Sharpshooter and The Shake, Rattle and Roll. I remember Damion, the hedgeclipper haircuts and hundred dollar bills being stuffed into unconscious wrestler’s mouths. I remember tag teams like Demolition, The Freebirds, The Hart Foundation and The Legion of Doom/Road Warriors. I remember Bobby “The Brain” Heenan (who I would do anything to get an interview with), Jimmy Hart, Mr. Fuji, Paul E. Dangerously and Slick. I remember War Games. Hell, I even remember the AWA and USWA.

I remember wrestling before the messed-up Benoit/Guerrero/Miss Elizabeth era (I guess the messed-up Von Erich era preceded that one, though). I loved pro wrestling growing up. Now, I’m a little too old and the sport has grown a little too ridiculous (or maybe too McMahonish). Deep down, though, I’ve still got nothing but love for pro wrestling.

That’s why I was thrilled today when I heard that The Namesake of this site, the one and only Pacman Jones, was officially joining the Total Nonstop Action Wrestling league. In the last few hours, it’s leaked that he won’t be wrestling or even a heel/villain manager/personality, and that kind of bums me out. Still, anything Pac pretty much gets me hyped, let alone his involvement with something as ridiculous as pro wrestling. Apparently, fellow Tennessean and TNA star Jeff Jarrett helped put the deal together. The Titans — felling that this will be both good pub and something to keep Pacman out of trouble — are reportedly totally on board.

This got me thinking about the history of star athletes turned grapplers. In the past, Dennis Rodman, Karl Malone, Lawrence Taylor and Mike Tyson, among others, have all gotten involved with America’s favorite form of “sports entertainment.” That being said, which current NFLers would make the best wrestlers? Here’s my list of current NFL players who should don the boots and tights and up the steroid intake…

The List:

• Joey Porter - The very first NFL player that popped in my mind when I came up with the idea for this list. Not only does he have the athleticism, intensity and physique, but also the gift of gab that all the great wrestler’s possess. If he could keep his cool once inside the squared circle, he very possibly could be the best would-be wrestler on this list. A meaner, cutter Junkyard Dog.

Face (good) or Heel (bad)? Heel

• Chad Johnson - While not as big as Porter, or as menacing, Ocho Cinco certainly has him beat in both the charisma and smack-talking departments. He would probably be the best pro wrestling interview since Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson was just The Rock. Johnson also has gimmicks galore, and is pretty ripped despite admittedly having a hard-on for Mickey D’s.

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Big hoops news: It looks like Kevin Garnett is headed to the Boston Celtics after all. It may seem like the Celtics are giving up too much — Al Jefferson, Gerald Green, Ryan Gomes, Sebastian Telfair, Theo Ratliff and a No. 1 pick — but this move has to make the Cs the favorites to represent the East in the Finals next season. In fact, I’m not so sure a K.G.-Paul Pierce-Ray Allen trio wouldn’t be tops in the league. (And, no, I didn’t forget about the crews from Phoenix and San Antonio.)

Man, this is the kind of move die-hard fans dream of. As a Pacers fan, I can’t tell you how many times I daydreamed about K.G. trading places with J.O. (back when we had Reggie, Ron, etc…). I’m not going to lie — Beantown sports fans have it fucking made right now.

- “Sources saying Garnett deal is done” Boston Herald via Deadspin

• From the “Holy shit!” files — Pacman Jones is going to wrestle (WTF!?) for Total Nonstop Action (TNA) during his year off from the NFL. I’m jealous as hell I didn’t break this. I’ll definitely keep you posted, though, as I do on all things Namesake. I pray to God that this is true. - 100% Injury Rate
• Da Bears pulled some Grand Theft Auto shit on the Buffalo Bills, stealing disgruntled DT Darwin Walker for a fifth-round pick. - Circling the Wagons
• Adrian Peterson has signed with the Minnesota Vikings. He will receive $17 million in guaranteed money, and potentially $40 million if he reaches all of his contract incentives. - The Viking Age
• The Green Bay Packers have a running back crisis. The Pack really, really needs to ink Corey Dillon. - Acme Packing Company
• Ex-Browns bust Tim Couch has signed with the Jacksonville Jaguars. Man, we’ve been writing about Couch way more than I thought we ever would. - Big Cat Country
• The top five New York Jets storylines as of the moment. While we’re talking J-E-T-S, you’ll want to draft Thomas Jones for your fantasy squad. Dude is going to have a monster year. - The Jets Blog
• Michael “Gap Tooth” Strahan must be serious about riding off into the sunset, because The G-Men are meeting with Simeon Rice today. - Big Blue View
• Priest Holmes lives! Good to see him back, well kinda back. I think we’ll all believe it when he actually takes some hits in preseason action. - Arrowhead Pride
• Last but not least, The Kingster has a new edition of his MMQB out. This installment focuses on Roger Goodell, and even includes a Q&A with the new commish. - SI.com