I don’t watch HBO’s Big Love, and I didn’t even really watch The Sopranos. The only HBO shows I’ve gotten into have been Curb Your Enthusiasm, Entourage and Six Feet Under. I’m aware that there is a show called Big Love, however, and that it centers around a polygamous family living in Utah. I’m aware that the series stars Bill Paxton, Chloë Sevigny, Ginnifer Goodwin and Jeanne Tripplehorn. I’m also aware that all of those three actresses are pretty damn hot when they’re not on the show.

Chloë Sevigny - Even though you might second guess her based on her movie roles — she was a lesbian in Boys Don’t Cry (with the Swankster, no less), had HIV in Kids and gave Vincent Gallo a real, uncensored hummer in The Brown Bunny — she’s a fox. She might not always look that great on screen — American Pyscho, Gummo, etc… — but in real life she’s hot. Hey, Charlize Theron looked like dogshit in Monster, right? Charlize never looks like dogshit (and Dane Cook will always be a loser). Ever seen Broken Flowers? No? You’re helpless. Just check out the above image and admit that you’d give her some Big Love without any deliberation.

Ginnifer Goodwin - Yes, she was the chubby girl who got played in Mona Lisa Smile. And, yes, I’m pathetic for having even watched Mona Lisa Smile. Forget all that — she’s smokin’ now. Did you see Walk the Line? Sure, she was hot in that, but she’s even more sexy now. She’s shed all the baby fat and is now looking like a cross between Carla Gugino and Katie Holmes. While you might rather do some Sin City sinnin’ with Carla or do what Tom won’t with Katie (hetero sex), you’d definitely still do anything you could to bed Miss Ginnifer. Don’t even lie.

Jeanne Tripplehorn - The ex-future Mrs. Focker is getting older, but at one point and time she was a hotter, less-talented Rene Russo. She’s been in two scenes racy enough to give any ED-free man wood: The above makeout scene from Timecode with Salma Hayek; and the scene from Basic Instinct where Michael Douglas shows her who’s boss. Douglas showed more than that — he showed teenage boys everywhere that it’s OK to bend chicks over couches and let ‘em have it. I think we’d all still like to do just that and get up in Jeanne’s personal Waterworld. With her consent of course. This isn’t Kazakhstan.

I have some bad news for all of us UFC addicts: We have to wait until August 25 for the next UFC PPV. For the next UFC anything, really. I’m not sure why Dana White doesn’t want to milk his product during the deadest period in sports (just regular season MLB is going on, which isn’t all that enthralling, and nothing else). I suppose he just doesn’t want to oversaturate his product.

The good news: The main event of UFC 74 isn’t going to get crazy hype, but the card will still be an unbelievable one, from top to bottom. Furthermore, the main events for UFC 75 and 76 — which take place in September and October, respectively — are going to be nuts. The main event for UFC 75 is PRIDE Middleweight/Welterweight Champion Dan Henderson vs. UFC Light Heavyweight Champion Quinton “Rampage” Jackson. Two champions who like to stand up on their feet and strike, and both are fresh off fights where they knocked-out high-profile opponents. Should be a crazy fight.

UFC 76 might be even better, as the main event there is Chuck Liddell vs. Wanderlei Silva [UFC Junkie]. Two stars, two strikers, two legends who recently got embarrassed and lost their titles in the process (ironically enough, by Rampage and Henderson , respectively). Both of these guys are going to be hellbent on walking out of Anaheim the winner, partially restoring their legacy in the process. Only one will be able to do so, though. I have no idea which fighter will win. Rampage beat Chuck twice, and Wanderlei beat Rampage twice, so you’d think Wanderlei would have the advantage. That’s really not how MMA works, though, as the match-ups are always way too complex to make those kind of comparisons. Again, this one will be a toss up.

In my opinion, the sport of boxing has only had two matches this enticing in the last five or six years — Lewis vs. Tyson and De La Hoya vs. Mayweather. Maybe, and this is a big maybe, Lewis vs. Klitchko and the Jones vs. Tarver fights belong in that class as well. Anyway, my point is that this fall the UFC will have two headlining fights that will have as much hype as any fight boxing has boasted since the new millennium hit. These UFC main events will also be more enjoyable to actually watch, as all four fighters finish fights. Boxers don’t finish fights any more, they dance and jab. When you dance and jab in the UFC, you get your ass booed (see Rashad Evans).

Even better news: It looks like my boy Anderson “The Spider” Silva will defend successfully defend his title in a re-match against Rich Franklin at UFC 77. How in the fuck can boxing even compete with the UFC right now? And I haven’t even discussed the rest of the fights on the UFC 74-77 cards. Boxing can’t; the Sweet Science needs to pull a Sarah McLachlan and make a Sweet Surrender (did I just mention Sarah effin’ McLachlan?).

It’s going to be tough for us UFC junkies to make it through the next five or six weeks, but the wait will be well worth it. Boxing fans, shit, you might end up waiting forever for your sports’ resurgence. The apocalypse will probably come first. I love(d) boxing, but on the night of the Cory Spinks vs. Jermain Taylor (you call these highlights?), I came to a realization. Boxing is in worse shape than The Namesake’s reputation.

Take this, Tom. You see, you aren’t everybody’s friend (I think I deleted his ass along time ago). To me, Facebook seems a little more juvenile than MySpace, and the creator is an absolute moron for not selling to Google, but what do I know? You just can’t argue with Kige Ramsey. His arguments are Cochran-esque.

A couple quick tidbits on the incomparable headline-making machine that is Pacman Jones. It seems The Namesake likes his whips… and likes them fancy…

• The Namesake is so famous, or infamous, that we even hear about cars he used to own getting sold, on eBay nonetheless. Considering that his old 2005 Chrysler Crossfire had Pac-Man character emblems on the headrests, I’m not at all surprised. The best thing about all of this is the woman who bought the car knew that Pacman used to own the vehicle. I wonder if that was why she bought it? - WBRS Sports Blog

The black, two-door coupe was registered to Jones when Parker made the purchase, and it had the Pacman video game character embroidered on both seats’ headrests. It was listed as having 28,000 miles with no warranty and a clear title.

“He had spent a lot on it, from what I gathered,” Parker said. “I’m not that familiar with that type of customization. I had to get a new speaker in it, and the stereo guy I work with said someone had spent several thousand dollars on the stereo alone.”

• That’s not the only Pacman automotive headline either. Apparently, he was pulled over a month ago by a sheriff’s deputy while driving his rather inconspicuous orange Lamborghini. He really knows how to blend in, doesn’t he? Anyway, he received tickets for failing to produce both proof of insurance and registration, and also for having the wrong plates on the old Lambo. - The Sports Frog

Keep up the good work, buddy, you’re keeping us in business!