Packers Sport Head-Bruise the Shape of Drew Brees’s Foot
The Packers‘ pass defense went into their Monday nighter against the Saints with a reputation as the most bad-ass in the league. Drew Brees and his birthmark scoffed at said reputation and proceeded to complete 20 of 26 passes for 323 yards and 4 TDs (most of it was Drew). It was the worst ass-kicking I’ve seen since that time I pitted my neighbor’s Schnauzer against a pit bull I shot up with some stuff I pinched from Bill Romanowski’s medicine cabinet. Boy was my neighbor mad. Apparently they were fond of the Schnauzer. They played with it and petted it and treated it like part of the family, and never once thought of slaughtering it for their own amusement. It takes all kinds I guess…
But back to the Packers. You would think a team with aspirations toward a division title would attempt to muster some defense, especially knowing that the two teams they were chasing had won the day before. I guess the Packers just don’t want it bad enough. I guess they’re content to finish third in the worst division not named the AFC West. I guess Charles Woodson and Al Harris and Atari Bigby and those guys don’t mind being beaten like Javon Walker at a Vegas party. Sort of sucks, considering how hard the offense tried. Those guys put up 29, which really ought to be enough when you have the alleged most unbeatable secondary in the league.
So, just how bad was the Packers’ defense last night? Jeremy Shockey caught five balls for 57 yards. That’s a good month for him anymore – and he got it all in one game. The Saints were really starting to regret that trade too, but they figure now, if they could somehow convince the NFL to let them play against the Packers’ defense every night, it would start to look a whole lot better. Unfortunately for Shockey and the Saints, the NFL has this weird thing where you have to play a new team every week. So Drew Brees will have to find a new pass defense to treat like his bitches. And the Packers’ “tacklers” will have to find a new set of opponents to stare at gape-jawed and helpless. Gap-control? What’s that? Something to do with a faggy clothing store?
