Barry Bonds’s Pee is on Steroids
A urine sample taken from Barry Bonds back in 2003 has tested positive for anabolic steroids. The long-preserved pee was analyzed by federal investigators, who seized a large cache of Bonds’s waste fluid back in 2004 as part of their perjury probe. Here’s the wacky thing: The very same sample, reports the New York Times, did not show evidence of steroids when it was originally tested by major league baseball. So what the heck does that mean? There are a few possibilities:
1. Baseball flubbed the original test and the pee actually has steroids in it.
2. The feds flubbed the later test and it doesn’t have steroids in it.
3. Baseball tested the stuff in 2003, found it to be full of steroids, and decided to keep it under wraps because they didn’t want to deal with the stain of the home-run king being on juice.
4. Everybody is screwing with us.
5. The feds put steroids in the sample before they submitted it for testing – for the same reason I can't believe they didn't find some WMD in Iraq.
February 4th, 2009 at 1:02 am