Kevin Smith Twitters His Despair at Devils’ Last-Second Loss to ‘Canes

Kevin Smith mostly uses Twitter to wax poetic about his love of weed, but sometimes he also gets his tweet on over his favorite NHL team, the New Jersey Devils.  On Tuesday night, those very Devils squared off against the Carolina Hurricanes in playoff action, and sure enough, Kevin was on Twitter offering his profane running commentary. Imagine Kevin’s despair over Devils goalie Martin Brodeur allowing the game-winning goal with just .2 seconds left on the clock.  Actually, you can do better than imagine…you can experience it, along with the rest of Kevin’s observations/outbursts:

Kevin Smith Twitters Devils/Canes:

Devils vs. Carolina Game 4, @NHL Stanley Cup Playoffs! Those of you uninterested in stick might wanna ignore my Tweets for the next 3 hours.

Um… I’m speechless.

Who the f**k woke up the Hurricanes? Too early, man. Alright, Devs – your work’s cut out for you. GO! GO! GO!

Carolina fans: if you love your team, thank Gretzky. His stint with Kings grew US interest in hockey enough for league to expand down south.

Alright, alright – we’ll take it. Man advantage. Time for a PSE&G POWER PLAY!!!!! But, y’know – in Carolina.

Okay. Ouch. Just… not good. Devils need to come like crazy now. Come like a teenage boy! Which is to say lots; not sexy or anything. Ew.

Here it is, Devils Legion: 2/zip. Lots of work to do. Bring it, boys. Create the space. Forecheck through the Whalers to boy wonder goalie.

I don’t remember being circumcised. But I imagine it felt something like this. F****************KKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!

They’re playing so much defense, there’s no time for offense. We need a miracle here. We need SCOT-TY STE-VENS!

BRYCE! NOOOOOOO!

BIG G!!! WAY TO BE!!! DEVILS ON THE BOARD!!! GORGEOUS F**KING GOAL!!!

Big third, boys. Bring it. Two more and we’ve got a game. Let’s go, Devils!

SCORE! SHANNY WITH A PP GOAL! OG DEVIL! 2/3!! C’MON, BOYS!! ONE MORE!!!

MOTHER OF GOD! THEY DID IT!!! THEY DID IT!!!! THEY’RE BACK!!! GAME THE F**K ON!!!! LET’S! GO! DEVILS!

They came back from a three/zip deficit! They’re the NJ Devils and they’re playing like a team possessed! (Nyuk, nyuk)

You… have got… to be… f**king… kidding… me…

C’mon, Toronto…

Make the right call, TO.

Bulls**t…

Sick burn. They didn’t deserve that win. At all. Nasty. Boo. Crap. 2/10 of a second. Ugh. And having to listen to Canes feed, re: Marty.

Just got off phone with Walt (Flanagan), who sounded like he wanted to put a gun in his mouth (or ass) over the .02 seconds crap.

Wound from Devils’ loss salved by arrival of only begotten daughter. Up early for 7am-ish call-in to Dean Blundell Show in Toronto. ‘night.

Wow, that sucked for Kevin almost as bad as Clerks 2 sucked for us.