10 Things That Would be More Exciting Than the NBA Lottery

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10 Things That Would be More Exciting Than the NBA Draft Lottery:

1.  Listening to Garrison Keillor tell that story about the time he watched the turtle cross the path.

2.  Watching Jay Mariotti shave his Eddie Munster bit.

3.  Grand Theft Auto: The Grandma-Approved Version.

4.  Attending a Bill Belichick impersonators’ convention.

5.  Witnessing the spectacle of Jason Whitlock taking a post-barbecue snooze in his Barcalounger.

6.  Nancy Pelosi working the pole.

7.  Going to a party at Bill James‘ house.

8.  Tennis without underwear-flash, grunting or water bottles.

9.  Sifting through the downloaded contents of Megan Fox‘s brain (would at least be a short assignment).

10.  Turning off your computer and reading one of those things…you know what I mean…people have them on shelves…and sometimes you see them propping up broken sofas.

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