
Richard Seymour has not reported to the Raiders yet and in a Pacman Jonesin’ exclusive, here are 10 things he would rather do than play for Al Davis in Oakland:
10. Drink his own urine
9. Drink Tom Cable’s urine
8. Be Eddy Curry’s driver/personal assistant
7. Hang out with Stephon Marbury 24/7
6. Get up close & personal with Shaq’s ass to find out how it tastes
5. Spend a weekend pleasuring Nancy Pelosi
4. Become a full-time parole officer for Raiders fans
3. Attend all Raiders home games in a San Diego Chargers jersey
2. Be teabagged by a sweaty Robert Gallery
1. Change Al’s Depends multiple times a day (diap-ahhhs contain the greatness of the Raid-ahhs)
Tags: al davis, oakland raiders, richard seymour, san diego chargers


[...] Richard Seymour really doesn’t want to play for the Raiders. Here’s what he’d rather be doing. (Pacman Jonesin’) [...]
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